How do you tell your boss you're struggling mentally?

When your mental health takes a hit, it doesn't take long before it starts messing with your work – and that can make almost every day a real struggle!

Whether it's stress, anxiety, feeling blah, or completely burnt out – it can feel like a massive weight to carry alone, or even worse, in isolation.

Having a chat with your manager could be a game-changer. They might be able to offer support and team-up with you to find a solution that works for everyone.

But, yep, I get it. The thought of opening up to your boss about all this can feel like a HUGE leap into the unknown 😬 It can be vulnerable and make you feel uncomfortable.

It's totally natural to feel a bit anxious or unsure about it. But, even though it sounds a bit scary, finding the right support at work is super important. And it could make things SO much better for you AND the company.

Let's figure out the best way to navigate this whole thing together, step-by-step. We'll get you feeling more confident and clear about how to move forward 😊

1. Is Your Boss the Right Person to Tell?

Before preparing for the conversation, it’s important to assess whether your boss is the right person to talk to.

Do you trust them?

In an ideal world, we could talk openly with our managers about anything.

But the reality is, there’s still some stigma surrounding mental health in the workplace, and it’s crucial to evaluate your own situation.

If you’re not confident that your boss will handle the conversation with care, it might be worth talking to HR first, or someone else in the company that you feel safe with. Alternatively, finding a specialist outside work can offer a great deal of support in this process.

But let’s assume you’ve decided your boss is the right person. What next?

2. Change Your Mindset - You’re Not Delivering Bad News

One of the hardest parts of telling your boss that you’re struggling mentally is the feeling that you’re delivering bad news.

It might make you feel less valuable, less important, or less appreciated. You might feel like you’re letting them down or admitting weakness, but that’s not the case.

What you’re doing is sharing important information. That’s it. Nothing more, nothing less.

After all, if they don’t know you’re struggling, they’ll just assume everything is fine, right? And when people assume 🤷‍♂️, things can get more difficult.

So, try to reframe the conversation in your mind. You're not saying, "I have bad news," but rather, "Here’s the situation, and I want us to work together to find the best way forward."

3. Take Responsibility (even if you don't have a complete solution)

Another crucial element of this conversation is taking responsibility for your situation.

This doesn’t mean you have to come up with all the solutions, but it’s helpful to show that you’re thinking about how things can improve.

You might not have a detailed plan to “fix” everything, but you can offer some ideas on what could help. Maybe you need to adjust your workload temporarily, have more regular check-ins, or take some time off to rest and take care of your wellbeing.

You’re not just coming to your boss with a problem - you’re starting a dialogue on how you can move forward together.

It’s a collaboration, not a complaint.

4. Frame It as a Partnership, Not a Problem

Your mental health doesn’t just affect you - it affects your ability to perform at your best. And in turn, that impacts the business. So, having this conversation is not just about your well-being; it’s about finding the best way for you to be a long-term, high-performing team member. The best decision for you is also the best decision for the business.

Think about it: no one wants a short-term solution that leaves someone burnt out and ineffective. Your boss will likely appreciate your honesty and your desire to work through this in a way that benefits both of you.

If they know you’re struggling, they can help manage expectations and avoid making assumptions that could only add to the pressure.

5. Be Honest, But Know Your Boundaries

It’s important to be open with your boss, but you don’t need to share every little detail about what’s going on.

Think about what’s comfortable for you to disclose.

You’re not obliged to talk about everything - just enough for them to understand that something is affecting your performance or well-being, and that you need some adjustments.

You could say something like:

“I’ve been going through a challenging time with my mental health recently, and it’s affecting my ability to focus at work. I want to be honest about it so we can find the best way for me to manage my workload and perform at my best.”

It’s simple, clear, and respectful of both your boundaries and your boss’s need to know.

6. Don’t Expect an Immediate Solution

Now just because you’ve told your boss doesn’t mean everything will be magically fixed overnight.

It’s a process, and it might take time to figure out the best steps forward. Be patient with both yourself and with them.

They may not have all the answers straight away, but just opening up the dialogue is a massive first step.

7. Remember: You’re Doing the Right Thing

It takes a lot of courage to admit you’re struggling and to reach out for help. And it’s not easy to have this kind of conversation with a superior. But by taking this step, you’re advocating for your own well-being - and that’s always the right thing to do. 🌱

Mental health is just as important as physical health. If you were injured or unwell, you’d tell your boss so they could make the necessary adjustments, right?

The same should apply to your mental health. It’s not a weakness; it’s part of being human.

Wrapping up

Talking to your boss about your mental health doesn't have to feel like you're dropping a bombshell. It's about opening a dialogue, a chance to create a more supportive and understanding environment where you can actually thrive🌱

Think of it as teamwork. You and your manager working together to find solutions that benefit both you and the company. After all, when you're feeling your best, you're able to contribute your best.

You're not alone in this. Many people face similar challenges, and seeking support is a sign of strength, self-awareness, and GROWTH 💛

So, take a deep breath, be honest and open, and trust that this conversation can lead to positive change.

Now, I'd love to hear from you. What are your thoughts on this? Have you ever had a similar conversation with your manager or colleagues? Share your experiences and insights in the comments below.

Let's learn and grow together!